Binay minion to PNoy: Slow down reforms or our boss won't be able to roll all of them back

Mon, 10/07/2013 - 08:00

By Alan Robles

President Benigno Aquino III should slow down his reforms to give Vice President Jejomar Binay a "reasonable chance" of rolling them back once he becomes president.

The appeal was aired yesterday by a shady troll claiming to work for the Binay party.

Tol Fapol, president, CEO and sole employee of the Binayaran Walking Tumor Enterprises online consultancy, said that "Aquino should be more considerate. How about giving an older guy a break?"

Vice President Binay, 70, announced early this year he was running for president in 2016. Analysts believe he has a good chance because of his money, political network and expertise in traditional patronage politics.

But Fapol said a Binay win would be "useless" if the new president were to just spend his entire term "trying to effing undo everything" the Aquino administration is implementing.

Aquino, 53, won the presidency in 2010 on a platform of "Tuwid na Daan"--an alleged straight and narrow path of honest government accompanied by reforms. Despite intense criticism from parts of the media, internet trolls and the church, his popularity ratings have remained inexplicably and unhistorically high into his mid-term.

According to Fapol, "We already have a full plate for when boss Binay wins in 2016. Just look at our to-do list: revoke the RH Law; bury Marcos at Libingan ng mga Bayani; settle with the Marcoses, letting them keep 80 per cent of their stolen loot in exchange for absolute immunity; release Gloria Arroyo; bring back Renato Corona as chief justice; revive the pork barrel; restore the colossal per diems and honoraria of appointees to government owned companies; prepare to welcome China to her South China Sea islands; downgrade military modernization to its traditional pointless level."

He added, "and let's not forget pardoning any senators and congressmen who might be convicted in the pork barrel scam. And bringing back wang-wangs and resuming sucking up to the bishops."

The consultant whined that "we're already at full stretch fighting the forces of yellow. We're running a 24/7 propaganda and disinformation effort making fun of Aquino and denigrating his administration. Our trolls over at GRP, Antipinoy and Showbiz Government on FB are demanding salary increases, our phantom text brigades are buying dozens of SIM cards everyday; there's so much to be done yet."

"Yet this guy Aquino keeps coming up with new reforms. It's enough to drive you crazy."

He sighed, "it's not like our forces have unlimited resources you know? We still have budgets to balance, we need money for stem cell treatments in Germany."

Fapol noted how "I myself haven't been paid in months -- come to think of it, you know what? I haven't been paid at all."

 

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