Beware the Marcos Loyalist Virus

Sun, 10/25/2015 - 20:01
 
Ferdinand Marcos was a deceitful dictator whose regime brutally murdered at least 3,200 Filipinos and tortured and jailed tens of thousands more. He destroyed democracy and stole at least US$10 billion. Now, knowledge of these crimes is threatened by an insidious Marcos loyalist virus slowly infecting the population.
 
We talk to Dr. Albert Kasuka, who claims to have studied the spread of this brain wiping disease.
 
Hot Manila: Tell us about this virus
 
Dr. Kasuka: I call it the MEV - Marcos Eboloyalist Virus. It turns otherwise normal Filipinos into raving, drooling pro-Marcos idiots. MEV erases knowledge of Marcos' crimes, replacing it with fanatical pro-Marcos desire. The patient becomes a raving troll or an Eboloyalist zombie who lurches around proclaiming his or her adulation of Ferdinand Marcos. Those infected are absolutely convinced Martial Law was paradise, a wonderful period.
 
Hot Manila: What kind of people get infected?
 
Kasuka: Anyone is at risk, but particularly prone are the youth, those with poor education, deficient brain functions. total lack of knowledge about Marcos and high opinions of themselves
 
Hot Manila: How do people get infected?
 
Kasuka: Through watching inane Youtube videos and low IQ memes put out by Marcos propagandists. Constant exposure to this hogwash, people's minds weaken and their brains are attacked and dissolved by hordes of the MEV, which under the electron microscope resembles the Marcos bust in Ilocos
 
Hot Manila: What are the stages of infection?
 
Kasuka: At first patients behave normally and in fact insist "I'm not a Marcos loyalist but..." Then they start foaming at the mouth. Soon they're screaming their love for Marcos, yelling MARCOS PA RIN every few seconds, singing the "Bagong Lipunan March" or "Pamulinawen", which as we all know was the favorite song of our beloved Marcos.
 
Hot Manila: Did you say "beloved"?
 
Kasuka: I did?
 
Hot Manila: What symptoms should people watch for?
 
Kasuka: The eboloyalist patient has a rabid aversion to facts, it seems to burn him, but MEV also seems to convince the patient he or she is an expert in political analysis, economics and history - when most of the time they probably failed high school recitation. The eboloyalist communicates mainly by memes, loves sneering "research ka muna" and is obsessed by the Mendiola Massacre and Hacienda Luisita. His or her posts are semiliterate and in all caps.
 
Hot Manila: What is the cure?
 
Kasuka: Bed rest, lots of real facts. Maybe a brain transplant will rid the patient of this irrational love for our glorious tyrant who did such great things for the country...
 
Hot Manila: Are you ok, doc?
 
Kasuka: Nothing can stop the Marcos juggernaut! Nothing! MAY BAGONG SILANG, MAY BAGO NANG BUHAY!
 
Hot Manila: And that was Dr Kasuka, who seems to be infected
 
Kasuka: PAMULINAWEN! PUSOK IMDENGAM MAN!
 
 
 

Comments

Submitted by Havi Benedicto (not verified) on
Saan na ang mga lintik na loyalista? Pahingi nga ng ma sampolan.

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